Beckenham UNDERGROUND

  

Gallery of Pain#7

A weird one this one - two Beckenham ladies sustain two very similar injuries the same week.  So obviously as part of their psychological rehabilitation they are happy to share their wounds in the underground. One is a confluence of buttock and dog, and the other a demonstration of the physics of a mountain bike, a tree and some gravity, but which is which?

 

  

 

- Some sailing pictures here

Club Anthem? All we need is the tune...- :update: we have now had a rival entry!

Entry1:

There's a great little place, it's just South of the Smoke,
and it's home to a fine bunch of girlies and blokes. 
It's made up of streets that wind upwards and down,
but these rugged old sorts run them all with no frown. 
 
There are parks that are leafy and riddled with tracks;
this elite club of stallwarts attacks them in packs. 
On the pavements and roadways of Beckenham town,
we're the ones who're out running, whilst others sit down. 
 
If the weather's inclement, we just love it more;
if it's windy or icy, we'll be outside the door; 
and we won't stop our scuttling, no matter how far,
til' we hold ourselves proudly, to prop up the bar. 
 

Entry2:

 

 

About 80 jolly old runners are we,

We run and we drink but in no priority

We welcome women and we welcome men

As long as you can run a bit not scuttle like a hen.

 

Some of us run very far

And some of us don't bother.

And some of us are rather strange

But we get on with each other.

 

So come down on a Wednesday Night

We wont make you run so far

You just run until you're sweaty

Then we all go to the bar.

Check out  more poetry  HERE....

Gallery of Mud#1

Gallery of Pain#6

YIKES!

Gallery of Pain#5

An amazing piece of Keyhole surgery, or a horrific industrial accident caused by an irate stapler-wielding recipient of "Help" from Nicky on her IT Helpdesk.  You choose which story you prefer.

 

 

 

Gallery of Pain#4 - The affect of Joining a running club...

Jemery Demonstrates that your body can undergo some extraordinary transformation by running, but then your dentist can ruin your new look...

Before...After...

Gallery of Pain#3

Gallery of Pain#2

 

Gallery of Pain#1

Jen's Leg. I haven't seen anything quite like this since I repaired my shed door...

In case you aren't quite sure what you are seeing here, this is RoboJen's Tibia and Fibula after a weeks walking in France ended in petite catastrophe.

 

    BU's advice and Tips on Diet and check out the Beckenham Runners' Breakfasts....

Read about the Fountain of Youth - good news about running from the new scientist.... if you dont read the whole thing it basically says if you lie around all day your body falls to pieces, but if you exercise you can recapture your bodies peak ability at almost any age.

 

 

Prose about Running (Andy keeps the day job)

Picture if you will, an idyll of pastoral serenity:-
A gentle breeze wafts the dove's murmuring voice
across the lea, as the lark ascends toward a deep
cerulean canopy, and in the distance is heard the bay
of the dog fox, gone to ground. 

A leafy tryst in the morning glow; a select group of
individuals, heterogeneous, but of one mind and
purpose, to hurry through the verdant undergrowth in
pursuit of their common, gruelling goal. 

An hour or so later they have re-emerged, perspiration
beading their foreheads, and with still heaving
breast; weary, enervated and footsore, yet elated, and
harbouring perhaps a droll observation, or poignant
anecdote, to save and recount to their peers at their
next group rendezvous. 

More Prose about Running after a good lunch (Yes, Andy)

Don't you find, though, how peculiar it is, that the
product of such an untenable medium, a harvest perhaps
leeched from the dim recesses of memory and invention,
can become strangely historically ephemeral, once
framed in the anonimity of unstructured reminiscence?

So, the recollection of favoured consciously selected
phrases can becomes thus simulatneously frustrating
and hilarious, yet bringing with it a certain joy in
rediscovery, and a coincident appreciation of
something lost. 

Ah, if this old keyboard could but speak... 

Haiku's About the London Marathon, Triumph and Despair

The sleek spring greyhound
Cruelly dogged by sausages
Runs more like dachshund

^

Spring Buds on Blackheath
 Shed petals at each mile
 Bloody Saveloy

^

Which of us can say,
 His race has not been destroyed,
 Due to sausages?

^

Breathless blur of bloom
   Third lap - spurred into sprint. Spent.
   Still Kate whips my ass.

 Rhyming Iambic Pentameter on Ted Pepper

My recollection, 
    is of a motley collection -
    Aspirational starters,
    and hard-working martyrs, 
    making earnest sorties, 
    and seeking sub-forties;   
    'Cos whilst there's a chance, 
    that they may just advance, 
    (and to be quite candid, 
    give themelves a tougher standard),   
    they're playing their joker, 
    to outdo other folk; A 
    result thus achieved, 
    leaves them then so relieved, 
    that they don't understand it, 
    when they've lost to a Bandit 

 

 

 

 

Gallery of Pain#2

Why do we do the things we do to ourselves?

   

Its not often your loyal webmaster puts pictures of himself up, but even I thought this degradation in my health was amusing, so here you go. Cabbage Patch 10, Pictures courtesy of ProSportPhotos.com.

 

2 Miles 6 Miles 10 Miles
going... going... long, long, gone.
 
 

?

 

Your unflattering image goes here... come on, join in! 

 

A Geek and his GPS - one day round Beckenham place park.

 

 

Coming Soon ?

More Advice pages on Fashion, Hair Care, and Pre-Race Motivation.

 

Uncle Hernia's Problem Page

 

Always seeking new material, please email the webauthor

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